Relationships play an important part in our lives but
they are tricky to get right. Some of the keys to successful
relationships are said to be things like good
communication, being honest about your feelings,
being affectionate often, showing gratitude, and so on. But there is one more important thing which is that each person in the relationship is
living their own individual lives to their full potential.
How we live our life as an individual defines how we
live our life as part of a relationship. If we are not true
to ourselves, not living our lives to our full individual
potential, then how could we fully commit ourselves
to building a successful and wonderful relationship?
It's not possible. The effort that each person brings into a relationship is directly related to the effort they
put in to themselves as an individual.
Relationships require sacrifices
Sacrifices are very important in a relationship. Being
part of a relationships requires an individual to
consider the needs and thoughts of the other person,
and sometimes even place those ahead of their own.
That is, there are times when an individual must make
a sacrifice for the sake of improving/helping the relationship or the other person.
But, and here's the catch, a person who is not fully
living their own life as an individual will be less likely
to choose to make a sacrifice. A person that feels like
they are "missing out" in their life, that they have not
achieved everything they want, or that their life has
been wasted, is not someone who will willingly make a sacrifice. It is only when you are truly happy being alone that
you can become selfless and dedicate yourself fully to
someone else.
Live your own life
What exactly does "living your own life" mean and
why is it so important? Put simply, every second of
our lives is spent with ourselves, living in our own
minds. We cannot take a break from it, we cannot go
live someone else's life, and we cannot simply shut it
off if we don't like what is happening. It's our life and we have to live it 24/7.
No relationship that we start will ever come close to
this level of time in our lives. Even if we managed to
spend every single second with our partner we will
still not ever be as fully immersed in the relationship
frame of mind in comparison to the individual frame of
mind. Our brains are wired to think as an individual and it is only through a conscious decision that we
move into the relationship frame of thinking, but even
so it is still our individual mind that was activated first
and had to make that choice.
As such the attitude we take to our life as an individual is what shapes everything else around us.
The way we choose to live, think, and behave as an
individual pervades our entire life. As previously
mentioned, every second of our life we are living as
an individual, therefore every second of our life is
determined by how we treat ourselves as an individual. If we do not respect ourselves, or cannot
be honest with ourselves, then it is impossible to
expect anything else from our life. This includes our
work, our family and our relationships.
If you are not fully living your life to your maximum
potential then you can never fully contribute to a
relationship.
The question is, have you been an individual for whole these times? If this sounds like you then you need to start making
some positive changes in your life. Find what excites
you in life, be honest at all times, try new things, and
never give up on your dreams. Do not settle for
"above average". Do not lower your standards to
accept what is nearby and common, but rather set your goals higher and see what steps up to meet
those lofty heights.
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